Picturing Texts on the Web

In light of the recent events, and due to the fact that I am a Detroiter, the website that I chose that was both interesting and compelling in design to me was the General Motors website.
The first page of the website is a picture of a big old SUV (how American) in the middle of the woods (even more American!) with three blue buttons across the middle of the page, each a link. The first link is titled “Our Mission,” the second “Our Vehicles,” and the third “Our Company.”
Just as it is pointed out in Picturing Texts:  Composition in a Visual Age, “All texts are created by a person or persons for some purpose. A good way to begin thinking about a text is to ask who wrote the words or created the image or designed the graphic, what the subject is, and who the intended audience is. When you identify this information, you can begin to draw conclusions about what the author or authors wanted to accomplish and why the text was created” (14). The texts on the homepage of GM’s website is very simple, from the images to the words. As I mentioned above, the SUV is in the woods and light is poking through the trees; this is a very simple image. As far as the words that are found on the image, “Our Mission,” “Our Vehicles,” and “Our Company,” I believe that GM is drawing our attention to the basics: what they’re about, what they’re selling, and who they are.
The three links in the middle of the picture are all symmetrical: placed an even distance from one another, in the center of the page both vertically and horizontally (26). Along with the actual image itself which has the SUV located on the right of the page at an angle towards the center and the light peering through the trees is located at the left of the picture shining towards the middle of the page.
By GM using three phrases, all two words each, and all beginning with the word “Our,” I believe that they are putting the emphasis on all of us and taking it away from the company itself. GM didn’t say, GM’s Mission, although it is obvious that is who’s mission it is (you are at gm.com), but the emphasis is on “our,” not “GM the company that just filed bankruptcy and is going to close down seven local plants.” “In most images, emphasis can be created by composition, by choosing and arranging elements in order to direct the viewers’ eyes to whatever the designer wants them to notice” (34). GM is clearly taking the viewers’ attention and directing it on the three things that it wants viewers to see the most, what they want to portray as what they’re all about: their mission, their cars, their company. That’s what matters to them, and that is what they want to matter to their consumers (hopefully).
Although their homepage isn’t telling much of a story with written word (remember, there’s only six words on the homepage), GM is telling their own kind of story, they’re telling viewers what they want them to see. There isn’t obvious sequence, but there is sequence. They’ve broken things down to the bare essentials, they’re telling everyone their story, they’re telling everyone what they’re about, their very own narration. Also, the image portrays this same story,  the same narration, ” images can tell stories” (38). It is obvious that GM’s image is clearly reflecting the same narration that their words are telling…and it is all based on simplicity (getting back to the basics) and what this company stands for (or what they want you to believe that they stand for).
Anyway, check it out – GM’s website…and Picturing Texts: Composition in a Visual Age too if you’d like!
Citation
Faigley, Lester; Diana George, Anna Palchik, and Cynthia Selfe. Picturing Texts: Composition in a Visual Age. New York: WW Norton, 2004.

Peer Review Recap, Part 2

I think that peer review went better, all around, this time. For whatever reason, it seems that it was easier for folks to figure out the wiki than it was for them to figure out google docs (I think the toughest part about google docs is inviting people).
This time around, I got way more advice, not only from the people in my own group, but from everyone. I also enjoyed being able to read more people’s essays. I think that it is easier to figure out what I am supposed to be doing when I can see other examples; sometimes one example isn’t enough to make things click in my head.
Anyway, people seemed a bit more enthusiastic about this assignment, both in their writing and in their comments.
I got some helpful suggestions, especially one places that I could add in stuff from the readings – I always have trouble figuring that stuff out.
So I give this experience two thumbs up, one more thumb than I give the first peer review.
And that’s that.

What are others saying?

As I began to read over my fellow classmates’ blogs in order to prepare for this entry, I found a lot of things that I agreed with them on, but I was surprised at how much I disagreed with them on. It seems like the class is pretty divided on which book they like more and found more useful.
I think that Rose Spybrook really identified how I felt by saying, “I thought The Elements of Style was a bit difficult to read and ostentatious in its teachings, but after reading Style I would have to say that I much prefer Strunk and Williams.” I really thought that I was being tortured when I began to read The Elements of Style, that is until I began to read Style: Toward Clarity and Grace.
Thus far, I only have one regret for taking this class in the spring and online: we had to read Style in about a week. I would have loved to have been able to really discuss this book in class because some of it was just clear over my head. As I read Jordan Schotz’s blog post, I was surprised that she said that she believed, “Style: Toward Clarity and Grace should be required reading for every high schooler.  Most of the concepts wouldn’t be too hard to understand to a high schooler,” because I had such a hard time understanding some of the points Williams was making as a college senior. I really think that class discussion in a classroom would have helped to clear some of my questions up. I agree with Nicole Clingan when she said that she isn’t sure if she would even recommend Style to undergrads unless he or she was going to be a professional writer. Style did help with some of the basic problems that I often have with writing, but it was very hard for me to get through this book. Nicole also mentions that she would recommend The Elements of Style for high school students, and I absolutely agree. I think that The Elements of Style contains many rules that help to form a foundation for writers and if they don’t learn them young, it could be hard for them to figure them out later when they’re working on improving their writing style.
Maxine perfectly stated things by saying, “They both [The Elements of Style and Style: Towards Clarity and Grace] offer tools that can assist a writer to craft a better work, but, just as a hammer and saw provide a different purpose for the carpenter, the books fulfill a different need that the writer might have. The Strunk and White book provides the rules of grammar and the Williams books provides principles of sound writing.” I understand that both books are important in helping writers to become more effective and more clear, but I think that they are clearly meant for different levels of writers.

Revising with Williams

Original passage: The Office of Community College Relations works collaboratively with the faculty and staff of EMU and  community colleges to enhance the educational transition process for community college students. Our purpose is to promote a seamless transfer process that minimizes the loss of academic credit and time in obtaining a bachelor’s degree. Many EMU academic programs have signed program articulation agreements with community colleges, that ensure the transfer of credit from an associate degree program to a bachelor’s degree program.

Revised passage: The Office of Community College Relations promotes a seamless transfer process by working collaboratively with EMU’s faculty and staff and community colleges. Many of EMU’s academic programs have signed program articulation agreements with community colleges ensuring the transfer of credit. This minimizes the loss of academic credit, thus the time to obtain a bachelor’s degree.

As I read the original passage for the first time, I had to do a double take. I wondered to myself, ”What the heck did I just read?” so I knew that this was probably a good few sentences to revise. However, I did have a lot of trouble trying to do so. I kept trying to keep the sentences as three separate sentences all containing the info that they had contained originally. Finally, I gave up on this and mixed the sentences up giving me the ability to cut some stuff out. I did this according to Williams’ chapter on Clarity primarily.

Peer Review Recap Part 1

After my group members figured google docs out, I think that things went well. 
I think that google docs is an extremely useful tool, especially in an online class where students most likely won’t ever meet.
Last semester (WI 09) I began to use google docs during a group project in a writing class. One of the girls in my group was taking this class and just learning how to use google docs. Since then, I have edited and uploaded almost all of my papers onto google docs that way they’re always accessible no matter where I am.
Personally, I never thought that google docs was a very confusing tool, I found it to be quite easy and self-explanatory from the get go, and I was surprised to find that not everyone found it to be as easy.
Anyway, due to the confusion with google docs, I was not able to read everyone’s paper in my group, and they weren’t all able to access my paper, but for those that did figure it out, I found it to be quite simple and helpful.
Here’s to hoping that all of the bugs are ironed out and the second peer revision goes more smoothly!

Comparing S&W with Williams

After reading most of Williams’ book “Style Toward Clarity and Grace” and Strunk and White’s book “The Elements of Style,” I really feel like I have learned a lot. Both books offer a great amount of information on how to become a more effective, thus a better writer. They both have their strong points and their points when I felt that if I didn’t put the book down immediately, I’d be bored to tears. However, the most ironic thing, I found, was that a good portion of Williams’ book was about how to be a more effective writer, more concise, more clear…and the book just seemed to drag on. Both books give examples after each “rule” or suggestion, but it seems that Williams’ examples often were overkill. In a book that almost exclusively focuses on how to get straight to the point, cut out all the crap, and be a clearer writer, he gives multiple examples that are very similar, drags on after making his point, and I feel that the book is just too long.
I love that S&W’s book can be picked up and used as a reference book, not Williams’ book. In order to get anything out of Williams’ book (or understand what the heck he’s trying to say) you have to read the whole book.
I think that S&W’s book does what Williams’ book should have done a little better, got straight to the point simply.
I feel that S&W’s book can help multiple people at all different writing levels become better writers. However, in Williams’ book, you have to come into it not only as a decent writer, but with a decent amount of knowledge. Williams’ book can’t be picked up by the average high school, or even young college student, and help them to become better writers – S&W’s book can.
Without a doubt, S&W’s book offers more information, in less room, with examples that are just as effective and helpful, without overkill!
I love the format that S&W uses, the reference type of format so that the book can both be quickly and easily read from cover to cover, and it can be used as a point of reference if one has a quick question on how to do something or apply a rule.
All in all, I will keep both books, and I found that both contained very valuable information. However, I think that Williams’ book would be more helpful if a teacher read the book and explained certain points to her students whereas S&W’s book could be used as a handy tool for students and teachers alike.

Strunk & White: First Impressions

I do have to say, I think that this book could be a great tool in helping student writers become better writers, but they would need to have a former knowledge of a few things before being able to apply these rules effectively. Writers looking to follow these rules would have to know the “basics” of punctuation and grammar.
I found the entire first chapter of the book very helpful. Commas have always been a thorn in my side when it comes to writing. I love the rule “In a series of three or more terms with a single conjunction, use a comma after each term except the last” (p. 2).  I know that journalists don’t follow this rule, and I know that that doesn’t make them wrong, but it still drives me crazy!!! It really drives me crazy when three things are listed and there isn’t a comma after the first two things.
I also found the rule “Do not explain too much” (p. 75) to be helpful to me as a writer because I have a bad habit of explaining too much which always ends up in me going on a tangent. Instead, it is advised to “let the conversation itself disclose the speaker’s manner or condition” (p 75).  I think that a lot of writers feel that they need to explain many things to their readers causing their writing to become a little too lengthy, repetitive, and wordy.
I think that both the rule “Write in a way that comes naturally” (p. 70) and the rule “Avoid fancy words” (p. 76) are both very important rules, especially for young writers. All through my high school years I equated fancy words and writing as a very sophisticated person with being a good writer. I recall reading back some of my papers and not being able to figure out what I had written! I thought that if I wrote in a way that came easily and naturally to me, my writing would be considered to be written by a kid and I wanted people to take me seriously. Instead, I often ended up looking like a fool because my writing would get lost in a sea of unfamiliar words (fancy words) with an unfamiliar voice (my fancy voice). Instead of looking fancy, I looked silly!
A rule that I really feel is outdated is, the “Form the possessive singular of nouns by adding ‘s” (p. 1)  rule. I think that adding ‘s to Williams’s book, for example, just looks too cluttered. I really think that Williams’ booklooks a lot cleaner. This very website underlines “Williams’s” showing it to be a misspelling.
Overall, I found reading this book to be quite torturous, but necessary. I feel like I wasn’t taught a lot of these rules, and it has had a negative effect on my writing. It is hard to apply all these rules when a good amount of them are all new to me, but I am going to try my best. I guess I am a little embarrassed to be a senior in college and still be learning “elementary” rules from a book meant for high school students.